Marital Problems

If you are having marital problems you have come to right place to fix them. The first thing you must know is that for you to even be able to fix your marriage and whatever problem is obstructing if from being happy, both you and your partner must be willing to work on it. A marriage is a union and is not about just one person, but rather two. So here are some tips to help you mend your relationship and get to how you guys were.

Tip # 1: Confront your problems

All couples, including the strongest relationships can cross areas of turbulence. While the stability of your relationship is proven, trying to bury the problems, no matter how minor they may lead to a downward spiral causing irreparable damage. You do not fight against the difficulties until recent disappearing or being forgotten. The first reaction is, however, usually avoid confrontation. This is the best way to let disagreements and disputes take root and split a couple. If you have clear ideas about your feelings on this or that point, the best thing is to approach it. Do not let time expand your problems; otherwise they will quickly become intractable.

Tip # 2: The Science of apology

Normally, if your past is pro in the art! Learn to apologize before his couple shatters can break the barriers between you and your partner. Whether you are responsible or not the problem in question is not important. What matters is being able to bring down the pressure and lower the guard of your contact. Highlighting your regrets about the evolution of a situation, you will demonstrate a concept of respect which will lead to a reconsideration of the seriousness of the facts and the restoration of a relationship of trust probably lost in the tumult of conflict.

Tip # 3: Do not be too prescriptive

We often talk about emotions and frustration in times of conflict. This can cause aggressive behaviors (both verbal actions that matter) to impose its point of view to another. We start demanding things of her partner and gets irritated if he/she does not respond favorably. That is like throwing oil on the fire. Your priority is to work with your partner in a cooperative manner, and not erecting you against him/her. Nobody likes to receive orders and be treated with an obvious lack of consideration. Clamp does not have the freedom of your partner; it is so inevitable return against you.

Tip 4: Sacrifice and compromise is the key to success

When the atmosphere is degraded in a couple, we often lose touch with reality. It focuses on “who is wrong and who is right” and even forget how much we love our partner. But the goal is not to “win” the battle, and to prove that your perspective is more relevant … I even want to say: WE IN FIGHT! This kind of behavior is due solely selfish and competitive logic that cannot afford a warm and friendly relationship. In short, this is the best way to go right into the wall. To break this vicious circle, you must recognize your share of responsibility in the breakdown of mutual understanding in your relationship, but also accept concessions. Take on yourself and swallow your pride, compromise is the most pacifist. Once again, this is a mature and assuming that the confrontation is useless, you will arrive at around the wall that stands between you and your partner. This will open the field for discussion and finding solutions adapted to finally see the light at the end of the tunnel and solve your marital problems.

….More at 4 tips to solve your marital problems and save your relationship

No one likes when their relationship is not doing so well, but you have to learn how to overcome that problem and fix it, together. The more you follow these tips and learn from them, the better you and your partner will be able to fix any problems the two of you have.

Marriage Questions

Question markIn marriage sometimes you have to sit back and question your relationship. Just doing this once in a while will make you see and realize why you married the person that you are with. You never ever want to lose sight of how you and your partner got to where you are because things will crumble. (Image by Marco Bellucci via Flickr)

These questions are from an excellent book titled Instruments in the Redeemer’s Hands by Paul David Tripp. Here are several revealing, open-ended questions about marriage that “cannot be answered without a person disclosing what he is thinking, what he wants, and what he is doing.”

  1. What things did you see in this person that made you want to marry him?
  2. What were your goals for your marriage when you were engaged?
  3. What things in your marriage make you sad?
  4. What things in your marriage make you happy?
  5. If you could press a button and change your marriage, how would it change?
  6. In what ways do you think God is honored in your marriage?
  7. How would you characterize your communication with your spouse?
  8. Describe how you and your spouse arrive at decisions.
  9. Describe how you as a couple resolve conflicts.
  10. How would you describe your spiritual life as a couple?
  11. Are there couples you look up to? What do you respect about their marriages?
  12. Why do you think you have struggled as a couple?
  13. What do you see as the strengths in your marriage?
  14. What do you see as the weaknesses in your marriage?
  15. What do you think you need to do as a couple to get from where you are to where you need to be?
  16. Describe the marriage of your dreams.
  17. What could your spouse do to greatly change you marriage?
  18. What problems in your marriage do you see as your responsibility?
  19. What do you think God is doing in your marriage right now?
  20. What do you think keeps you as a couple from solving your problems?
  21. Describe how your marriage has changed over the years.
  22. When you are hurt or angry with your spouse, what do you do?
  23. How do you communicate dissatisfaction with your spouse?
  24. Pick one area of your marriage where you think you have problems. Describe what is wrong and what each of you have done to solve it.
  25. In what ways have you attempted to communicate love and appreciation to your spouse?
  26. What are the biggest hot buttons in your marriage?

…More at 26 questions to get a marriage talking

 

From answering these questions have you opened your eyes and realized why you are married to you husband or wife? If so whether it is good or bad, now you know where to work from and move forward from if you have marital problems.

Marriage Today

We all know that all relationships are not perfect, but they can at least be close to it. In order for that to even happen you have to look and see what type of surroundings your relationship is in that might cause harm to it. To have a good healthy relationship you have to be aware of factors that could deteriorate it so that does not happen.

If love, peace and joy are major priorities for our unions, it is important that we be aware of the major distractions that affect our marriages.

1. Selfishness. Too many of us are caught up in our own selfish wants and it diverts the attention away from our partners. Marriage is about putting our spouse first and making sure their needs are met before our own. We must remember that we are not in a relationship by ourselves; marriage is about giving more than we take.

2. Job-Related Stress. The stress that we allow to come home and dwell with us will eventually kill our marriage if it isn’t stopped. The pressure eats away at us causing frustration and resentment that we bring home and share with our partners. It affects our communication, confidence and overall health. When we are stressed by our job, it’s best to allow our spouse to support us, be that shoulder we need to lean on and that listening ear; instead of a punching bag to release on.

3. Other people or a grass is greener mentality. Exes on Facebook who make us feel good, a cute new friendly coworker who shows us a little bit of attention, and those not so real friends who are quick to tell us to walk away from a relationship when there is a small challenge are all major disturbances. The silver lining with this one is that we are still in control. Staying focused on the positives in our marriage leaves little room left for these other diversions.

4. Self-Doubt and Self-Consciousness. Being worried about things like the baby weight we’re struggling to get rid of will result in our not feeling attractive or appealing to our mate. This will ultimately make us shy away from intimate experiences with our spouse. Whenever we feel inadequate we must take action. So if it’s weight let’s work at losing it and changing our diet. But we must keep in mind, we are as sexy as we feel and we must continue to do the things that make us feel good about ourselves.

5. Money or lack of money. Money makes people lose sight of what’s most important. Many couples tend to fight over money, not be completely honest about money and have a secret “just-in-case” account which shows a lack of trust for the other partner. We cannot allow money to have dominion over our relationships. If there is less of it, we have to get creative and be honest and smart with our decisions. But love, health and joy should outweigh money any day.

…More at 5 Major Distractions Affecting Our Marriages Today | Black and

Now that you know all the factors that you should be aware of in your marriage in today's world, your relationship should run more smoothly by remembering that these factors could harm your relationship. You just have to find a way in which they do not penetrate your union at all, and if they do you both know how to work and fix it so you do not have further marital problems.

Benefits of Marriage

Playing with LoveHave you ever wondered are there benefits to marriage? Well they are and they are all good benefits if you are in a healthy relationship with someone you really care about. Maybe you and your partner should look into marriage because of these great benefits that I am about to tell you. (Image by FotoRita [Allstar maniac] via Flickr)

Marriage is hard work, no doubt about it. But, marriage has many benefits as well.  Marriage represents life-long commitment and therefore provides love, loyalty, and companionship for a lifetime. The emotional benefits of a life-long committed relationship are huge.  

In addition to emotional benefits, numerous researchers and writers point out other benefits such as financial benefits, legal benefits, and health benefits. One article I found suggests 6 benefits of marriage – 1) increased pay, 2) increased promotions, 3) Keeps you out of trouble, 4) Satisfies you at home (yes, that is a veiled reference to sex!), 5) Helps you beat cancer, 6) Helps you live longer.

Focus on the Family suggests the following benefits:

  • More likely to live longer
  • More likely to be physically healthier
  • More likely to be mentally healthier
  • More likely to be happier
  • Recover from illness quicker and more successfully
  • Generally, take better care of themselves and avoid risky behaviors

Now, I'm not encouraging you to run out and get married, just because there are significant benefits.  The truth is the success of any marriage depends upon two key factors – 1) marrying the right person and asking God to be the center of your marriage and to help you along life's journey.  

But the benefits do make me wonder why so many people avoid marriage and just live together???  I'm sure it's complicated, but the one big reason I see is “fear”.  People are afraid of commitment, of divorce, of marrying the wrong person, of feeling trapped, etc.!  

That gets me thinking about some other benefits of marriage – 1) marriage helps live a life of significance rather than selfishness, 2) marriage helps me build something with my life (i.e. family), and 3) marriage helps me learn to truly love.

…More at The New Life Blogger: The Benefits of Marriage

Now that you know all of these great benefits, maybe you will change your view of marriage and start working towards dating, courtship, engagement and finally … MARRIAGE!

Origin of Marriage

vintage wedding portrait, unknown ladyMarriage has come a long way from what it was, but the real question is how did marriage come about, what is the origin of marriage? We know what marriage is now, not what it was like in the past. Maybe we should know so we can get a better understanding of things. (Image by deflam via Flickr)

The word ‘marriage’ denotes an action, contract, formality or ceremony, by which a conjugal union is formed. It can be defined as “an institution where interpersonal relationships, usually intimate and sexual, are acknowledged by a variety of ways, depending on the culture or demographic.” People marry for various reasons, such as legal, social, emotional, economical, spiritual and religious. The institution of marriage came into being, as societies wanted a secure environment for the perpetuation of the species, a system of rules to handle the granting of property rights and protection of bloodlines. Most primitive cultures did not have any formal ceremony. It was with time that the rituals evolved. Different cultures and different religions claim a different history of marriage. Read on further to know some interesting and amazing information on the origin and background of marriage.
 
Interesting & Amazing Information On Origin & Background Of Marriage
There is no evidence of the date when the first marriage took place, although the Old Testament does mention a little about marriage, since it was considered a family and household affair. Different cultures have different legends concerning the origins of marriage. The parents usually married off their children young. Usually, the marriage was for economic reasons and right after marriage, there were lots of children. The partners continued the relationship even if they were unhappy, abused or felt unfulfilled. One of the oldest and recorded marriages can be discerned from Hammurabi’s Code in the Mesopotamia Civilization.
 
One of the most frequent customs associated with marriage was the capture of woman by her intended husband, usually from a tribe other than to which he himself belonged. This symbolic seizure of wives continued in many places. According to the ancient Hebrew law, the man had to serve his intended bride’s father for a period. Some places involved a dowry i.e., the bride’s family giving money or presents to the groom and his family, while some demanded a bride price, that is, the groom or his family gave money or presents to the bride’s family. Sometimes, the union was accompanied by a ceremony, most commonly in the form of a feast.
 
In 1563, when marriages took place without witnesses or ceremonies, the Council of Trent declared that marriages should take place in the presence of a priest and at least two witnesses. Still, love wasn’t a necessary ingredient for marriage. Years later, the Puritans viewed marriage as a very blessed relationship that gave marital partners an opportunity not only to love, but also to forgive. European marriages were more like a business agreement, where the families arranged marriages of their children and romance, love or affection were not essential. The average age of marriage in Europe in the late 1200s to the 1500s was 25 years.
 
In the ancient Chinese society, people having same surnames were not allowed to marry and doing so was seen as incest. In ancient Greece, men usually married when they were in their 20s and 30s and expected their wives to be in their early teens. They married in winter and believed that marrying on a full moon brought good luck. Same-sex unions too have a long history of records. They were celebrated in ancient Greece and Rome, some regions of China and at certain times in ancient European history. The tradition of an engagement ring can be dated back to ancient Romans. They believed that the roundness of ring represented eternity and thus, it symbolized a union that was to last forever.
 
As you can see marriage has definitely changed from then to now. Marriage has become more about love and wanting someone there by your side now. Marriage is not about economic and financial issues now at all, well maybe in some countries, but for the most part it is all about love.

Marriage Proposal Ideas

If you read the last article called Engagement Proposal Ideas, we talked about doing a proposal that you and your fiance would never ever forget. You want that special engagement proposal that you will always remember and want to tell the story of how it happened so others can say “how sweet”. Here is a video of very unique proposals that you could learn from when it is time for you to propose to your loved one.

I hope you were able to think of a great proposal from these unique proposals.

Engagement Proposal Ideas

Getting engaged is amazing, but can be very nerve-wrecking for you guys out there. As a guy wanting to make a great proposal you are constantly thinking what can I do that will blow her away and remember this special day forever. You do not just want some boring dull proposal, but something meaningful that shows your love. Here are some tips to get you thinking of a great proposal:

Chris & Jessica Engagement

1. You need a plan in mind, and the sneakier the better. We actually recommend hiring a wedding planner if you can because planners can take of small details that you would have never thought of. (Image by Auzigog via Flickr)

2. Hire a photographer. I just photographed an intimate NY wedding proposal and it was a truly special moment that I am so thankful this couple has the photos to cherish it for years to come.

3. Ask for help, even if you hire a planner, ask friends and family to help with ideas, alibies or fake date plans. One surprise proposal I photographed, the guy had his friend who got engaged send a fake engagement invitation so she thought she was in NY for an engagement party, but when she arrived to the gorgeous rooftop of a modern NY hotel, it turned out she was the one getting asked the big question.

4. Find out her taste in rings. We are seeing a trend of women not choosing their rings but mentioning to their loved ones their style of choice. This makes the proposal extra special by giving it an additional dose of surprise.

5. Last but not least have fun and be you. We can only plan so much and the day will unfold as it is meant to me so have fun with it

….More at Unique Marriage Proposal Ideas – Un-Jersey Bride

At the end of the day, you have to have a proposal that both you and your partner will remember forever because it showed the love and chemistry between you two. Even if something bad happens and you both laugh, it will be memorable because you both love each other enough to laugh and continue on.

Getting Engaged

Getting engaged is the best feeling ever because you have finally made a big step with someone that you love; you're basically past looking for marriage. Of course now you are so happy you just cannot believe it and do not know what to do. Well here are some tips to help you express all of you happiness of being newly engaged.

After you’ve oohed and aahed over your new rock and you’ve, oh you know, made him the happiest man alive, you may be wondering what you should do next. Do you set a date? Who do you call first? When should you start working out to get that perfect figure for your figure-hugging dress? Looks like you need to cut back on a new pair of shoes a week and put that money into a wedding fund instead…

Slow down, tiger. Here are five things a newly-engaged girl needs to do:

1. Remember this moment

This will be the moment you’ll recount, ad nauseam, to friends, family members, colleagues you barely know and even your grandkids, one day – the moment when he popped the question.

Take a deep breath and savor the moment, and try and remember as many details as possible about this moment – how you felt, how he looked, even what you were wearing. Hold hands. Kiss. Maybe even cry a little!

2. Pick up the phone

You may do this reflexively; pick up your respective phones to broadcast this all over social media – the modern-day equivalent of shouting it from the rooftops!

But it’s always nice to tell the people nearest and dearest to you, first – you don’t want your mum finding out about your engagement from your neighbor’s daughter, who found out from Facebook!  Give your respective parents a call first, followed by siblings, if you’re close, and then your best friends. Everyone else can wait!

3. Decide on an approximate date

Notice how we say ‘approximate’? Very rarely will freshly engaged couples have a fixed idea of when they will tie the knot! We ask you to think about this, because once you tell people you’re engaged; the question to follow will be “So when are you getting married?”

Don’t stress about picking the perfect date right away – maybe March next year suits, or end of the year, because that’s when your fiance finishes his PhD. Or maybe your approximate date is two, three years from now – that’s okay, too!

4. Seek inspiration

Maybe you’ve been secretly buying bridal magazines or bookmarking internet pages, or like my bestie Jolene, you’ve been secretly hiding a Pinterest wedding board! Have a general idea of what you’d both like to do and then see which is the most feasible option later down the line after the engagement high has worn off.

5. Take one day at a time

Rome wasn’t built in a day, nor was a fantastic wedding soiree planned in the two hours following your engagement. That said; allow yourself a minimum of nine months to plan for your big day – anything less than that and you’re cutting it fine.

…More at Five Things To Do After Getting Engaged | Wedding Guide Asia

Getting engaged is exciting because it is the nest step to marriage, but relax and just do not over think everything because you are so happy. 

Dating For Marriage

Gerbera daisy with raindrops, peach color, contrast enhancedWe all know that marriage is a beautiful thing; many people on planet earth are looking for marriage and that amazing person that they cannot live without. In order to make sure you find this right person you have to bring these questions to the table. You want to make sure that the person you are dating is on the same page as you. (Image by Martin LaBar (going on hiatus) via Flickr)

This is what you need to consider: Does he/she make decisions that benefit the relationship instead of only the individual? Does he/she share his/her life goals and seem to want to works towards them together? Does he/she care about how his/her actions affect you? If your partner is willing to work to keep your partnership going, then it is most likely that he/she values the relationship and is looking long term. And you can’t assume this without asking!

At a certain point in an ongoing relationship, you will have to bring up the subject of marriage if you have already committed to yourself to the goal of marriage. If you want to reach that goal, you have to talk about it. Nothing scares off a person in a dating relationship faster than talk of weddings and family stuff too soon. However, don’t be afraid to communicate in generalities that your goal in dating is to find a marriage partner. For instance, you might say, “I’m looking for a relationship that will lead to marriage, are you?” If that statement scares away your date, then, so be it! It shows that the person you were dating with is not truly marriage-minded. The response you are looking for is, “So am I!”

Be mindful of the conversations between yourself and your potential partner. When does the topic of marriage come up? When in the dating relationship are you ready to know if he or she is interested in finding a marriage partner? Who should bring up the subject of marriage? Do you cringe when a date brings mentions this too early?

The sooner you learn if your partner is marriage-minded (or not), the better off you are! How are you finding out if the person you are dating is marriage- minded? At what point in the dating process are you bringing up your life goals in the conversation?

…More at Do you know if your partner is marriage minded or not? | Motivated

If you have not scared your partner off with marriage talk and they seem to be on the same page as you, you have found someone worth keeping because they want the same dream as you.

Looking For Marriage

The KissAre you looking into getting engaged soon and having your happing ending with the man or woman of your dreams? Well first thing is in order to even get to this step you must be available and putting yourself out there to find someone that is right for you. You have to begin dating and not just one person, but many to find the right person. Once you do find the right person you need to date just them for some time and form a relationship and get to know them. (Image by wtl photography via Flickr)

Initial, dating before relationship helps you understand your lover better to be able to be able to get together with minimal clash. The merging associated with two people from different backgrounds will probably bring with it lots of ups and downs, therefore it is preferable to have the struggles just before marriage, to understand if you possibly could deal with them before relationship.

Second, when dating using the main goal becoming to get wedded, it helps the particular couple focus on what they should expect in marriage. This concentrate will help you assess whether you are ready for marriage always, and the responsibilities that come with it. There are a few couples which have realized while dating before marriage, they are not suitable for each other and also have ended the connection before having a wedding.

3rd, understanding each other’ s loves as well as disfavors are most likely to become discovered when dating before marriage. The more you understand your lover, the more likely you will be able to obtain along better still within the relationship. It is during this courtship period that you will get to be aware what you are able to handle, and also characteristics that you not be able to experience.

4th, future plans and also ambitions of a pair are discovered when dating before marriage because they discuss different factors of their life. Most of the time, the particular plans and even goals of each partner may differ because they are living person lives. However, as the courtship progresses it is very important be aware of the potential of harmonizing future plans, so you have a similar concentrate.

5th, dating before relationship strengthens a relationship because of the various existence situations that the pair has to go through together because they prepare for relationship. It is in these life situations that you see your companion for themselves, and the ability to deal with different situations that could also arise in marriage. However, for some partners, these situations open up their eyes towards the realities of the life they may be likely to live in marriage and they also choose to choose.

Additionally, friendship in dating is developed with time, and this cannot be done without courtship between two people. Friendship is essential in a relationship because there are times when the feelings associated with love will not be presently there, but since you are close friends, there are many points associated with connection.

…More at Significance of Dating Before Marriage

You will find the love of your life and marry them. You just have to remember that in order for everything to be good in that relationship and future marriage you must know each other completely.

Husband Wife Romance…Getting the Marriage Healthy Again

Has your marriage begun to deteriorate because the romance is not there anymore? The first steps you must to before even jumping into getting romantic is first mending your relationship and fixing the problems with in it. You must communicate and recognize what is going on and get to the bottom of the problem. Once you have found the root to the problem then you can begin fixing your relationship and in due time get back to romancing one another. This video should further elaborate and help you bring the romance ideas and love back into the both of your lives.

College Romance

i found you.The real question that must be asked when it comes to romance is, is romance dwindling mostly because college students are pushing it to the backburner and are more interested in being involved in sexual activities because they are at an age, time and place for experimenting and trying out everything? This is something that must be acknowledged as to is it just a phase or will individuals of the college scene realize romance ideas and how to be in a romantic relationship. (Image by .bravelittlebird via Flickr)

“Hooking up” – a trend in college campuses that involves casual, no-strings-attached sexual encounters may be replacing traditional romantic relationships, researchers have warned.

A new study by researchers with The Miriam Hospital's Centers for Behavioral and Preventive Medicine suggests college students are not actually hooking up as frequently as one might think. According to their study, romantic relationships are still the most common context for sexual behavior – at least among women in their first year of college.

Researchers report romantic sex with a boyfriend or relationship partner was found to be twice as common as hookup sex in this particular group of students. ”Hooking up is one way that young adults explore intimate relationships, but it's not the most common way, and it is often exploratory,” Robyn L. Fielder, M.S., a research intern at The Miriam Hospital's Centers for Behavioral and Preventive Medicine said.

“So while hooking up gets more attention in the media, college students continue to develop romantic relationships, which are actually the most common context for sexual behavior,” Fielder said.

“Hooking up” is a loosely defined term characterized by intimacy, ranging from kissing to sex, between partners who are not dating or in a romantic relationship and do not expect commitment.

However, Fielder said that little is known about the frequency of sexual hookups, how this prevalence changes over time and whether hookups are replacing romantic relationships among college students in general.

…More at Hookups replacing romance in colleges : Love and Dating – Fropki

College romance is a tricky one, but it is safe to say that college students understand romance and some are actually in romantic relationships. Some are choosing not to be tied down and in romantic relationships because they want to experiment.

Romance For Men

 

I'll Stand With You Between Forever and Always, My Love (creative commons freebie)

The little sweet things done always are what impress women, it shows there is romance. By not doing anything at all though just makes them feel unappreciated and not loved. Men, if you really do care about the lady that you are with, show her start thinking of some romance ideas. Show her does not mean by buying her love, but by saying and doing things that makes her feel appreciated. (Image by Pink Sherbet Photography via Flickr)

On dates, women like to be taken to fine restaurants, and sophisticated evenings of theater, or perhaps a British romantic film, followed by some insightful conversation, and then directly home, with perhaps some casual, witty flirting at the door before saying good night.

A man’s fantasy date? A triple Wham-Bam Burger at a Hooters restaurant, the latest superhero movie, and then having at each other like wild monkeys at the Sin-Sational Motor Lodge, featuring heated, revolving water beds.

Men use cologne when they start dating. This gives women the mistaken impression that their man naturally smells like an exotic rain forest or tropical island breeze, and will always smell that way. Is it any wonder, then, that problems arise later, when the man feels he’s got the woman and no longer needs the cologne? For now his natural aroma is a mixture of beer, tobacco, the dog, and last night’s burrito.

Once sex has occurred, women expect their dates to cuddle. Cuddling and talking is bearable for maybe the first minute and a half afterwards. Beyond that, centuries of male genetics kick in, so that even while the woman may be talking about her feelings about how you are different from any other men she’s ever known, the man’s brain is filled only with images of having a pizza while watching football – something with absolutely no cuddling and talking after sex.

Men believe that God wouldn’t have given them the ability to make gross noises with their various body parts, if he didn’t want them to do so. Okay, let’s, just for the sake of argument, say this is true. Nonetheless, it nauseates women. Yes, even if you say “Excuse me” afterwards. Or swear the dog did it.  Women never believe that, and the dog ends up resenting you.

Women feel they don’t have to inform their men why they’re upset; men should just know. The odds are really against this one working, simply because men make so many mistakes all day long, that to have to guess which of them is ticking their woman off, would not only be time-consuming, but sheer luck.

Should the date evolve into a marriage, men expect women to earn a living, take care of the house, raise the kids, and be eager for sex every night. And what do men do in return? Once every three weeks, they’re asked to open the lid of a jar. After doing so, they get this look on their faces, as if to say, “What would you do without me, babe?”

Finally, women expect men to say, “I love you.” This one is not a mistake. Women need to hear it. And men need to say it a lot more often – even if it means shouting it from the other room, while they are finishing their pizza. Hey, it’s the thought.

…More at Mistakes Men Make In Romance | Featured | JMag

Once you start the romance, do not end it because you have gotten comfortable and figure you have your partner reeled in. This is a common mistake made because you do all these romantic and special things in a beginning of a relationship and then all of a sudden it stops. You cannot let it stop that will just drain your relationship of the love in it.

Romance is Dead, Really?

Holding On To LoveIs romance really dead? Have romance ideas left planet earth? Well I do not think so at all. Some people just have forgotten exactly what romance is. If you have read the post from a few days ago, then you know what romance is. If not, I suggest you read it so you understand what romance is. Romance is not dead unless you are not trying. If you are not trying it is dead only because of you and in just your life only. Romance is out there, there is still chivalry going on, you just have to live up to it and find someone who also lives up to your visual of romance. (Image by Pink Sherbet Photography via Flickr)

What happened to surprising your loved one with a bouquet of flowers, a guitar, and a sappy love song? How come now it seems like love is only expressed with material objects with no real thought behind them? I may be a hopeless romantic, but I know that love is not about the objects; it is about the feelings and emotions felt between two people.

It is not to say that romance is dead, but it is just the idea of it that ceases to exist. Romance is supposed to be when you hold each other with no words being spoken, while knowing how much love there is in the relationship. Nowadays, people often think that the way to a person’s heart is buying them whatever they want. Expensive gifts are not the key to a significant other’s heart.

It seems like the only time that acts of love are displayed during times of apology, like when one forgets the other’s birthday. Instead of showing affection when you feel bad, do it spontaneously to show how much you care. Even sending a three page text message about why they love that person out of the blue displays romantic love. Being romantic is being unexpected.

It is the small acts that count for a true romance. I think some couples should take advice from any 80’s movie considering that real romance is displayed in them. Even waiting for your boyfriend with a birthday cake while sitting on a table, like in the movie Sixteen Candles, shows that the romance in your relationship is not based off of expensive gifts but more on thought.

…More at Romance is dead

As you see romance is something that you produce through love, though and feeling, not money and fulfilling your sexual needs. Romance is alive and well, you just have to kick start your romance engine again and get it started.

Definition of Romance

 

♥ The Drongo Love ♥ Happy Valentine's Day ♥

Everyone is searching for romance at some point in their life. People want to feel loved and cared about by someone that truly means it and is not just acting like they care for an underlying reason to benefit them. With romance you have to know what the definition of romance is and how to implement it. I am here to of course help you discover what exactly romance is and to give you some romance ideas. (Image by VinothChandar via Flickr)

I think every man should learn the true definition of what romance is, it has nothing to do with sex.
  1. It's how you stimulate her mind and show her how gentle you are.
  2. It's through real conversation and showing her how original you are.
  3. Be her friend when she's going through…..let her know you're interested.
  4. Non sexual compliments will show her you're a gentleman.
  5. Gaze deep in her eyes and tell her she is incredible, never lie to that woman or you'll be labeled as not credible.
  6. Step inside of her world and find out why God gave her to you, understand what she felt the very moment God gave favor to you.
  7. Focus on building trust and don't let lust screw it up, when the moment starts to get heated stray away from that
 
With now knowing the definition of romance, I hope that you are able to apply this in your life and show someone that you truly care for them past a sexual basis. Beyond that, you are now able to have a starting point of where and how someone should treat you in a relationship.

Looking for Dating

 

lolaDon't worry I have not forgot about all my single people out there, I always have some words of advice for you when it comes to looking for dating. I get it we are all fed up of that friend that loves to mention their boyfriend or girlfriend in every conversation. Thing is, sometimes it is us getting jealous because we haven't found the right person yet. We end up getting mad at those around us in happy relationships because we are not it one. (Image by torpore via Flickr)

That person didn't come in to their lives with a business card saying “I'm the one — No Heartbreak Guaranteed.” So, in retrospect, their meeting may seem serendipitous — all part of the mysterious workings of fate. But they were looking — if they weren't, they would have never given The One a chance.

I don't believe it's possible to not be looking. To not look is to give up any hope of finding love. As far as I can tell, there is no better feeling in the world than to love and be loved. Why would you ever give up on finding that? Why would you ever stop looking?

Second of all, it doesn't make any sense. How can you meet someone if you never go out on dates or put yourself out there? Prince Charming doesn't magically show up in your bedroom, or at your office, or even in your yoga class, and decide to fight through all the walls you've decided to put up because you're “not looking for it.” If you were unemployed, would you sit around and magically hope that a job was going to fall in your lap while you were “doing something you loved,” like painting watercolors or watching your fav shows marathon?

Thirdly, there's overwhelming proof to the contrary. If no one that looked for love ever found it, online dating wouldn't be a multi-million dollar industry. Its growing success is based on very simple logic. Love feels good –> Humans want love in their lives –> They look for love online –> They find someone else looking for love online –> A connection is made. They tell their success story and all their single friends, looking for love, join Match.com and Tinder and OKCupid. They drown in endless profiles, and analyze tentative text messages and come home exhausted from awkward dates — all while holding on to the hope that, at some point, they'll go on that one date, and their search will have been worthwhile.

So stop. Stop with the lectures. No more clichés. Don't tell me I'm going to find love when I'm not looking for it, because I refuse to give up. And don't tell me that I have to love myself first — it's because I love myself that I will not stop looking. It's because I love myself that I believe that I deserve to find love, and I will look for it until I find it.

…More at It'll Happen When You Stop Looking – Huffington Post (blog)

So remember by giving up on looking for love, you are just giving up on a chance of meeting someone great. Be optimistic, not pessimistic.

Serious Dating

We all already know that dating is difficult and sometimes when dating someone, the two of you may not be seeing the same things going on in your relationship. When you are seriously dating someone you have to be able to open up and say how you feel to your partner if things are bothering, especially when it comes down to time and how often the two of you see each other. Your partner may not even notice this until you bring it to their attention. This video is a great example of the situation and you should be able to learn a thing or two.

Relationships are Like…

 

ConstructionI haven't stressed it enough but relationships take time. You cannot just hop into a relationship and think that everything will work out perfectly. That'll never happen. To be in a good relationship you must be patient and let things go with the flow by getting to know one another and building off of that. Just getting someone's name and basic facts is not a stable relationship at all. (Image by on1stsite. via Flickr)

Relationships are like buildings. When constructing a building the bricks, metal piping, and lights don’t just fall into place; it doesn’t get built simply because the architect wants it to. There is a level of planning, intentional work, testing, rebuilding, and support. The strongest buildings are ones that have built on a foundation, then put together piece by piece.

Now this seems like it's pretty simple. You might even be saying, “Well duh. Everyone knows you can’t build a building from the top down.” But then why do we think that relationships should happen that way? I used to know a girl who was convinced she was going to marry this guy; she just knew from the minute they met each other. But when they first starting hanging out she couldn’t figure out why it wasn’t ‘clicking’ like she’d hoped. She even got frustrated that he wasn’t already everything she’d been dreaming of since she was a little girl. She couldn’t figure out why the building wasn’t built yet. 

Well, relationships are like buildings they have to be built up on a good foundation. This foundation takes time to lie, and may be argued that a good foundation is only created through time; by spending everyday life with each other. For those construction guys out there, they know that a good foundation also takes a little time to settle everything in. But now this is when it's strongest. This is when the building will stand even through lasting struggles or storms.

So how do we take this idea of building relationships and apply it our lives? Like setting a foundation, relationships need Time, Work, Intentionality, and lots of LOVE. It may take a while to build a strong relationship with that guy, or that girl, but one things sure, when you can take the time to put in a little extra effort building the lasting foundation, it will always make the difference.

…More at Relationships are like Buildings

Remember take things slow, you have to start from the bottom when beginning on working into a real dating relationship. You cannot just be at the top and think that everything is going to be fine, eventually that building–relationship is going to crash. If you want a nice good relationship that last forever, take some time and really understand one another.

The Importance of Relationships

In America some of us have a thought process that having a romantic relationship, whether good or bad, makes us feel more full and not alone. We have big fears of being alone forever which is why we have dreams and thoughts of a long lasting relationship being marriage or not. We want real dating and want to be able to feel wanted but also have all feelings be reciprocated.

A close romantic relationship is generally believed to be better than a distant one. According to a new study, “Closeness Discrepancies in Romantic Relationships,” however, the degree of closeness in a relationship does not necessarily translate into how happy a person is, both in the relationship and generally.

The Kiss...The study – published online in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin in February 2013 – found that satisfaction with a relationship is not determined by how close a person is to their partner but rather by how much that level of closeness corresponds to their desired level of closeness. In other words, someone can be very satisfied with a relatively disconnected relationship as long as they aren't seeking a greater connection. (Image by Thomas Leuthard via Flickr)

The study's authors, David M. Frost, an assistant professor at Columbia's Mailman School of Public Health Cat Forrester, graduate student who studied under Dr. Frost at San Francisco State University, had 732 men and women complete annual online surveys over a three-year period. The surveys included questions on relationship closeness, relationship satisfaction, commitment, break-up thoughts, and depression.

Fifty-seven percent of those surveyed wished they were closer to their partner; 37 percent were happy with the level of closeness in their relationship; and five percent said they felt too close to their partner. Satisfaction in the relationship, however, was not determined by level of closeness but rather by degree of difference in the “closeness discrepancy.” The larger the closeness discrepancy, the unhappier the person was in their relationship — regardless of whether they felt too close or not close enough to their partner. A high degree of difference in the “closeness discrepancy” is linked to a greater likelihood of breaking up.

danielstarkphotography.comWhile the study demonstrates that relationship satisfaction is derived from an alignment in real and desired closeness, there is no denying that we are inundated with information emphasizing the importance of an intimate romantic relationship. A 2008 study examined the link between American culture and romantic closeness, finding that the cultural importance placed on romantic relationships can actually lead to a greater degree of loneliness when one is not engaged in a relationship as compared to South Korea, which doesn't place the same premium on romance. (Image by Daniel Stark via Flickr)

…More at Healthy Relationships Are Less About Degree Of Closeness Than About … – Huffington Post

As much as some of you may want to be in a relationship, you must remember that you will only be happy in a relationship that you are deserving of. This also means that your partner must feel the same way.

What Happened to Courtship Dating?

 

CourtshipTimes have definitely changed. We currently have an issue with rushing into relationships before fully getting to know someone and starting as friends, taking things slow. Courtship has flown out the window and may be the reason why some relationships are not successful. We are in an era now where we do not want to put gender restrictions or say how a certain gender should act and be, but maybe when it comes to meeting someone we have interest in we should take on the gender roles. The man should approach so we know he is interested and the woman should be able to either accept his approach and proceed to know him or not. (Image by perpetualplum via Flickr)

In this generation, hooking up comes before dating, and I’m not so sure that’s a good thing. I think modernizing traditional courtship is the best way to get a solid relationship.

Some women express interest in a boy that hasn’t exactly reciprocated the interest. Good advice is to back off completely. Most people enjoy a chase; it is common for most people to want what they can’t have. Think about it: as a child, you wanted the toy your parents said you couldn’t have. Now, you may want the hottest thing, especially when everyone else has one and you don’t. I strongly believe this goes for dating also. If you give attention to someone and they don’t give it back, couldn’t it be a little bit true that you’re that much more attracted to them because they aren’t reciprocating? And we are hardwired to think that someone is more attractive when others think they are attractive, because we see them as more viable. These are just things to think about when you’re getting a little crush crazy. Remember, you want someone who puts out some effort.

Traditional courtship — picking up the telephone and asking someone on a date — required courage, strategic planning, and the willingness to bruise your ego with a possible rejection. Not so much with texting, Facebook, Twitter, or other forms of “asynchronous communication,” as techies call it. In the context of dating, it removes much of the need for charm; it’s too easy. If someone doesn’t answer your text, you act like it didn’t happen. This kind of communication also allows for multiple opportunities, someone could talk to multiple people and none of them could ever find out. Then when someone shows interest, they can pursue them. In addition of doing this, it sets the stage to not be exclusive and to be able to talk to more people. This goes for both men and women. I think this type of communication is really going to hurt us when we get out of a college environment; we won’t be able to just text someone and expect them to be able to meet us for a quick drink; we will actually have to make date plans.

I also think this sets up the possibility to be afraid of commitment. By being constantly in communication with so many people, it may be causing an inability to sit down and have a deep conversation with someone. It may also cause the “bigger, better” syndrome, in which when you are getting serious with a person, start to think there may be someone better out there.

I know the days of traditional courtship are long gone and would be ill-fitted for this generation, but I strongly believe updating some of the old actions could be of great value. Instead of texting the person you like, call them. Instead of going to a party, go out for coffee or a walk. I think little things like this could really do wonders.

…More at Gettin down with… courtship – Washington College Elm

Sometimes we need to go back to tradition when it comes to certain things just because it works in the scenario of dating. We are in a real world so you should be doing real dating by picking up a phone and calling one another rather than taking the easy simple route of texting. Doing all these things mentioned shows you are interested.

Marriage Issues

There can be many issues in marriage, but in order to even know if you have issues in your marriage, here are a few that will help you. These issues of course are issues that are a sign that you two are better off not together. All relationships are not happy and that is something that you need to know. An unhealthy relationship is not safe.

Ceasing to be partners: When one partner feels the other is immature, irresponsible, untrustworthy or selfish, the marital dynamic will crumble, destroying intimacy and sexual attraction. One partner will then 'detach'. Domestic abuse is the most extreme version of this.

There's often no turning back from detachment, so it's important to recognize and start marriage counseling before breaking point. A marriage counselor can't manufacture a connection, only strengthen it. Domestic abuse is the most severe form of 'detachment', when one partner no longer feels equal to the other.

flickrlove - the safe option?Chronic complaining and blame-throwing: When marital problems are not resolved to the satisfaction of both, resentment builds – and this erodes relationships. (Image by the|G|™ via Flickr)

Solving a problem by compromise is more important than being 'right'. Individuals who cannot accept accountability are doomed to fail in relationships.

Narcissism: Everyone is narcissistic to some extent, but this is problematic when partners are unable to empathise with each other and instead compete over issues such as who works harder, who spends more time with the children, who had a tougher day.

When partners don't understand the other's contribution, each assume the other has it easier and neither feels understood.

Flourescent Family ValuesAddiction: Addiction will always be an addict's main focus above marriage and family, and their partner will feel angry and embarrassed by their lack of consideration for others. (Image by Darwin Bell via Flickr)

If a user is unable to give up their habit they will shift blame onto their partner, who may try to hold the relationship together for a while – especially if children are involved – but will eventually give up if there is no recovery. Parents will often try to stay together for the sake of their children, but once these four problems have run too deep there is little hope for a marriage

*McWade explains it is important to correct marital issues before they become habitual behaviours and are imposible to change. It's difficult for couples to change long-standing relationship patterns by themselves because people tend to argue for their own points of view. Communication doesn't get anywhere without a neutral perspective. Patterns must be recognized and interrupted.

…More at It's over: The four problems NO marriage can survive (and having an affair ISN … – Daily Mail

In order for you to have a successful marriage issues must be addressed even before marriage is brought to the table. So when starting in a relationship it is best to get things off of your chest about how you feel and that still applies to those that are married. This will help improve your relationship.

The Cure to Marriage Problems

 

Forever and Always Two Bright Flowers On Blue Sky free creative commonsLove can only get you so far in a relationship, but if you want a marriage that last you have to come to the table with more than just love. You need to know how to treat your partner, know your partners needs and much more. Hopefully these tips will help you improve your relationship so that you can have a marriage that is healthy and last. (Image by Pink Sherbet Photography via Flickr)

Marriages are a test of our emotional and life skills. Since most of us were never taught many of these skills, it is no surprise that so many marriages, even those that are based in love, are a continual struggle and often fall apart.

The following is a list of interrelated emotional and life skills that are necessary for a well-functioning marriage. As you read through the list, ask yourself: Which of these am I good at? Which of these do I need to improve? Which of these are hard or nearly impossible for me? Are there any skills that I think are missing from this list?

  • An ability to know and name your emotions at any given time.
  • An ability to communicate your emotions verbally and directly.
  •  An ability to manage the full range of your emotions without acting out destructively toward yourself or others. (Acting out destructively means channeling your internal feelings into behaviors that cause emotional or physical damage to yourself or others.)
  • An understanding of what helps you to manage emotions, and a willingness and ability to seek those supports when necessary.
  • An ability to tolerate feeling a lack of connection to your partner sometimes.
  • An ability to disconnect from other people, technology, and other types of stimulation, and to be alone with yourself.
  • An awareness of your physical needs and a willingness to make choices that optimize your physical health.
  • An ability to be emotionally present for a loved one even when you are unable to do anything to fix his or her pain or suffering.
  • An ability to laugh at yourself.
  • An ability to see how your actions, even when well-meant, can sometimes negatively affect others.
  • An ability to apologize and take responsibility for the way your actions affect others.
  • An ability to communicate verbally, directly, gently, and respectfully to others when their actions affect you negatively.

…More at Healthy Marriages Require More Than Just Love – Atlanta Black Star

Your relationship is only as successful as you are. If you know who you are as a person, you should be able to have a relationship in which you have the skills to overcome any problem thrown at you. This also means that your partner must have these same skills and know who they are themselves.

 

How to Fix a Marriage

 

TimelessThe love between two loving people is beautiful. There are relationships out there that are struggling and not doing so well because people forget that their job and all those things do not provide the love and care that their partner can give to them. When things go bad your job cannot comfort you, you need your partner for that, so here is some more insight to improve your relationship. (Image by birlewphotography via Flickr)

Marriage is a hard job in its own. It's about learning when to speak up, and when to shut up. You pick your battles, and sometimes you start wars you never meant to finish. Sometimes the best laid plans go awry, and sometimes you can't fix the things you mess up. It's a little bit scary when you think about it like that. It's very easy after a long, hard day at the office to go home and forget that your partner might have had the same day, and that he or she might need whatever you need back from them as badly as they do. But you're both too darned tired to see the forest for the trees. Or rather, to see what each other needs and be there for each other.

So what's the solution to this one? In this world where most of us work full time and all of us are worried about money and the future? Obviously, nobody can juggle all those balls successfully all of the time. Family and work are the trickiest ones because your family is always willing to forgive you for ignoring them… or are they? Work is sneaky because it masquerades as Baccarat crystal when really it's a recycled giant ball of rubber bands that will probably dry rot on you eventually anyway, no matter how much attention you give it. And yet, how many of us find ourselves using work commitments as an excuse when we should really be doing something with one of those legitimately fragile globes? How many times have you postponed plans with someone you love to fulfill the wishes of someone who pays you?

Alright, enough with the bad metaphors. Do you spend enough time with your husband or wife? Does he or she complain that you don't? In this day and age, if you're hearing complaints, it's probably legit. Face it, aren't almost all families double job, double income nowadays? So we're all like ships passing in the night because nobody has the exact same schedule, nobody has the same deadlines, and nobody has the same sorts of worries that keep them up all night long. A very famous and brilliant political consultant name Bob Goodman once told me that if I ever owned my own company, I'd never sleep another solid night again. Damn, I hate that Bob is always right. What I didn't ask him about when he was explaining how to grow my career and build success was how to make sure I had time to spend with my husband and other people I love at the same time. Is it even possible? I see other people doing it. Why is it so hard for me? Is it easy for everybody else? Or does it just look that way.

It doesn't matter how everybody else is doing it. What matters is that we (you, me and all the other married couples out there) have to figure out a way to make it work. We have to make time for our life partners. We have to make time for our health. It's not okay to forgo visits to your elderly relatives when you finally have a moment to yourself that you'd rather spend doing anything else — reality check, they aren't going to live forever. Everything I've just mentioned is a glass ball. And there are so many, many more of them depending on who you are as an individual. The list is pretty scary when you really start to think about it. It seems insurmountable. But it's not. Partially because, in the scenarios I'm referring to, you are not alone. You are fortunate enough to have a husband or wife who loves you and is there to share the burden… or to help you juggle. If you let them.

The moral of the story — put your spouse and marriage first. It's the ball that's really made of fragile, irreplaceable crystal and it's the one that needs the most love, attention and diligence. If you keep your relationship happy and healthy, you will automatically have a stronger foundation for everything else you're trying to juggle. Remember, four hands are far more effective than two.

…More at The Glass Balls Of Life And Marriage – Huffington Post (blog)

Marriage is something special that should be watched and monitored. You want your relationship to flourish and grow no matter how long you have been with your partner. Once your relationship stops growing, that's when you should be worried and remembering this article and working on your relationship. 

Saving a Marriage

SAVE MY MARRIAGE!

From this video you have learned that in order to save your marriage, spending time with one another is important. Improve your relationship by spending time together. You have to have a good relationship in which you both are showing affection. By just showing affection your partner feels wanted and cared about. Having time to be alone with your partner is vital and how you can save your marriage.

Communication in Marriage

 

[ Tell Me Your Secrets ] Blue Telephone : Paris Charles De Gaulle Airport : FranceThe basis of a good relationship; whether you're dating or married, is to communicate. With relationships over time people forget how to communicate with their partner. They either forget their partner does have feelings and talk to them any way they want or they just do not talk that much because they are so consumed with their own life to realize that their partner is there. (Image by || UggBoy♥UggGirl || PHOTO || WORLD || TRAVEL || via Flickr)

Most problems in marriage do not come from money, in-laws, or children. All couples face strife but the main reason most couples break up is communication breakdown. The couple that learns to properly communicate can work through almost anything.

Here are a few biblical principles that can help you as you relate to your spouse:

Apologize. Perhaps the most important ten words in your marriage are these: “I am sorry. I was wrong. Will you forgive me?” Say these words and say them often. You’re not perfect and you will offend your spouse, often times unintentionally. Swallow your pride, admit you were wrong, and ask for forgiveness. Couples who fail to apologize to each other grow further and further apart.

Offer Forgiveness. When we hold onto offenses we are holding onto something that will cause bitterness and resentment. We are happier and healthier when we choose to extend forgiveness regardless of whether or not an apology was offered.

If we do not forgive it is as if we are drinking poison and waiting for the other person to suffer harm. Too often we hold our mate to a higher standard than we hold ourselves to. Forgive your spouse and let God work on their heart.

Respond Softly. Relational tension escalates quickly. We say things like, “They know what buttons to push,” or “They make me so angry!” The reality is no one can make you angry. Anger is always a personal problem that must be dealt with internally and by God’s grace.

Instead speak with a soft tone when you are having a conversation about something you and your mate disagree on. We have a choice: we can use our words to stir anger or we can use our words to turn anger away.

Choose love. Love is determined by the one choosing to love and not by the one being loved. Your spouse doesn’t have to love you first in order for you to love them. Love really is a choice that you must make.

Be Kind. Someone once said, “If you’re unkind, you’re the wrong kind.” Kindness always accomplishes great good. If you want your spouse to not just love you, but like you, then practice being kind. Too often we treat the most important person in our life in the worst possible way.

…More at Communication in Marriage ‹ Pastor & Staff of Eastland Baptist Church

Improve your relationship by talking to your partner and talking to them with respect. Communicating with your partner will also bring you two closer as you learn new things about them whether it be their daily task or just how they feel about things.

Cheating in a Relationship

With the times changing and media telling us what is what, we must come to an underlying understanding of what constitutes cheating in a relationship. You must define this definition within your own relationship with your partner so you both have an agreement of what is and isn't allowed.

It used to be that if you had an affair, that was cheating. But what really is an affair these days, and with the addition of Facebook and other forms of social media, constitutes cheating in a relationship?

No matter how long you've been with your spouse, you might want to have a discussion about what you each considers infidelity in marriage, or at the very least, what both of you will and won't tolerate in terms of faithfulness.

9 CrimesMen and Women Have Different Ideas About Cheating In a Relationship

One survey found that 75% of men thought that sexual contact equaled cheating, which started with a kiss and built from there. However, women in this same survey felt that things like dancing too closely, flirting, or even confiding in other women counted as cheating. (Image by lanier67 via Flickr)

Many women feel that sharing details of family life or personal struggles is a betrayal of trust. This is how emotional affairs start and develop into a closeness that can replace the friendship bond with a spouse.

Facebook, Texting, and Cyber Sex

With the Internet and social networking, the definition of cheating has expanded. While some partners might wonder how you can technically cheat when you've never actually met someone, like a person you encounter in a chat room, others feel that talking dirty, sharing desires and even looking at pictures is wrong.

Communication Is the Solution

While you can't technically stop your spouse from cheating if he or she has the desire to do it, you can make it clear what you expect in terms of fidelity. Having a frank discussion can mean one spouse doesn't overstep without meaning to.

A good way to start might be to ask, “Are you on Facebook?” and go from there. Ask who their friends are on the site, who they see and make contact with. You can continue with a talk about what you consider to be infidelity or crossing the line in a marriage, and each of you can put your expectations clearly out in the open.

…More at What Exactly Is Cheating In a Relationship Today? – LifeGoesStrong

In order for there to be no form of cheating in your relationship you must talk to your partner and tell them what you are feeling or feel is lacking in the relationship. Communication is the most important part of holding everything together that the two of you have.

 

Relationship Insecurity

 

insecurityWhen in a relationship you want to make sure that it is a healthy one that is not taking away from you in any way. Yes, we are here to help you gain and achieve a beautiful flourishing relationship in which you can grow close to someone, but we also want you to know when to quit a relationship that is threatening your health so that you can find a better one. (Image by sarah grutas via Flickr)

According to a recent research carried out by researchers at the Ohio State University, feeling of insecurity and anxiousness in your romantic relationship may pose a serious threat to your health.

The findings were based on study of some 100 couples and researchers took note of their general anxiety levels and quality of their sleep and married life. It was then found that participants exhibiting higher levels of anxiety and insecurity possessed higher levels of stress hormone called cortisol.

At the same time, they were reported with lower level cells dubbed T-cells, which help body's immune system to kick off the infections. Frequent worries about losing romance and faith in relationship proved highly detrimental towards heath.

The study asserted that, in many of the couples, angst emerged from the thoughts like if their partner really loved them. In addition, a number of partners feared rejection, leading to adverse physiological consequences and putting a long term affect on health, affirmed Lisa Jaremka, the lead Author of the study and a postdoctoral fellow at Ohio State University's Institute for Behavioral Medicine Research.

“Everyone has these types of concerns now and again in their relationships, but a high level of attachment anxiety refers to people who have these worries fairly constantly”, she added.

…More at Insecurity and Anxiousness in Romantic Relationship May Spoil Health – TopNews United States

This help in a relationship is needed because when you are in a relationship that takes a toll on your health, it is time to just walk away. You never want to be in a relationship in which you have so many doubts and insecurities. When this arises you should try therapy first and see how things go from there.

Trust Relationship Failed

Relationships are built on trust and the only way to get that trust is to get to know one another while respecting each other. By respecting someone you are showing that you trust them. A trust relationship can fail if one partner lets the other down in a way in which they do not feel open to share things with them anymore. This trust can be rebuilt, but it takes time and patience because you have to regain your partners trust again by showing them that you have changed, not by telling them.

Relationship Difficulties

Help in a relationship should not be sought out by your friends. Most people do not realize it but your friends are going to say things that do not necessarily pertain to you and your love life. When you ask outside sources for help that are not relationship therapist they tend to try to help you by saying what they would do which may not be good and make the relationship worse.

I learned the difficult way that whenever I need guidance on relationship matters, my round of friends is not at all the place to seek that help. My marriage started to become a chunk shaky after the initial three years or so, and rather than inquiring tips of Get more info about Coachs Factory, I listened to my girlfriends. Doing so almost ruined what was basically a good marriage.

I would advise anyone who is inside of a position where they require guidance on relationship obstacles to look for the help of trained providers instead of counting for their friends in acquaintance to supply them with quality guidance.

Relationships are difficult in sometimes assistance is a necessary part of exercising differences between individuals. Thinking about getting involved as a few comes having a myriad of prospective misunderstandings, challenges and complications that individuals have to work around. Luckily, assistance is available to get the relationship out of those awkward situations and love you again toward a happy life.

The essential common help available is guidance from a third party who is outside things. With regards to is time to get relationship help, the number one resource for assistance is an expert who understands both sides of the story in is prepared to accommodate the few to get to a satisfying conclusion.

…More at It is possible to eliminate loving relationship difficulties | Health …

When looking for help with your relationship you should always remember not to go to your friends for help. Your friends are not a neutral party and will say what will make you feel right.

How to Better a Relationship

Do you need help in a relationship? A relationship is something that needs time and attention. Some people do not realize that a relationship must be nurtured in order to grow closer and better. Communication, appreciation, passion, trust and having fun will remedy a relationship that is not doing so well like it was. This video should help you to better your relationship.

Young Men Dating Older Women

Men should not be intimidated to date older women because they can learn a lot from older women. Older women can give younger men insight to how women think and are. Overall it is just a good experience when it comes to dating older women guys because you will not only learn more about women, but more about yourself. I hope this video has answered some questions you may have had about dating older.

Dating an Older Women

 

Don't let the term cougar define you. If you believe that is a negative term for a woman dating a younger guy, throw it out the window then. Don't let people discriminate on what you're doing in your love life. It is your life after all. The most important advice on love is that age is nothing but a number and that is all it should be thought of as since most ambitious people do not let their age define them. (Image by transp via Flickr)

“Old enough to be your mother” has grown into a term of endearment and wonder as both parties attempt to navigate these socially uncharted waters. Certainly, there is a unique allure, a deep exploration of one’s own identity that comes up for a woman getting busy with a male possessing a fraction of her years.

Women are more commonly dating younger men for a myriad of great reasons:

  • She has been recently widowed or divorced;
  • She has just racked up a slew of negative experiences dating men in her age bracket or older;
  • She is seeking an adventure or wishes to expand her sexual horizons by testing her skills and stamina with an individual of surefire virility.

Additional benefits to dating younger males include:

  • Finding the carefree young person again that remains within us all;
  • Feeling beautiful and sexy at any age;
  • Exploring social and sensual roles and boundaries with openness;
  • Diversifying one’s own experience as it relates to generational identity;
  • Playing the role of teacher, leader or dominatrix with a guy interested in playing the role of student, follower or submissive can be both liberating and exhilarating for both parties, opening up new avenues for intimacy.

It is well documented in all areas of life that if you are doing anything at all correctly, you will have “haters” who may gossip viciously about your dating choices in attempt to make themselves feel better about their own unhappiness.

…More at Cougar Time: Tips On Dating Younger Men | Ready Flowers Blog

Dating a younger man has nothing to do with the fact that he is younger so a woman feels in control. For some that may be a plus, but more than anything women date younger because they want to feel appreciated, young at heart again and loved again.

Dating Younger Women

Men, some of you are much more attracted to younger women because they make you feel alive and young again. They bring new things to the table such as thriving conversations, going out and many other things. Well here is a video with some information on how to date younger women and what to expect when dating them. This advice on love should hopefully help you find the right gal to have a youthful relationship.

Dating Older Men

When dating older men, women you have to weigh the pros and cons. You do not want to jump into a relationship with an older man because of the fact that he is much more mature than the guys that are in your age bracket. Yes, an older man is mature but that means he's going to come into the relationship with set expectations of how things should be done. So when dating older these things must be discussed so that you are both on the same page with what both of you want. Hopefully the video presented was also insightful on advice on love when it comes to dating older guys.

Age Gap Relationships

 

I'm Putting Out The LanternAge gap relationships have become typical in this day and age. With it becoming typical it also is becoming accepted more than before. There are still those out there that do judge couples with age differences, but who are they to judge if you find yourself happy in love. (Image by Brandon Christopher Warren via Flickr)

The perfect age gap for partners is four years and four months – but only when the man is older, a survey has found. A study of 2,000 adults showed that just one percent of women believed the “ideal relationship” was with a younger man. Men were also reluctant to be a boy toy, with just two percent saying they would rather be with an older woman.

The majority of respondents said an age gap was preferable, however; forty percent said three to four years was the ideal age gap, while thirty percent said five to six years.

The survey, by Confused.com, found that many women would be happier with a larger age gap, with one in three saying they would date a man seven years older.

Despite this, more than a third said they assumed when they saw a women with a much older men that he was “very rich”, while one five assumed “it wouldn’t last”. A quarter said that they viewed women with older men as “gold-diggers”.

Those in favor of an age gap said the main benefit was that “you can learn from the different perspective of the other partner”, while four in ten said “the youthfulness of the younger partner rubs off on the older partner”.

Counselor and relationship expert Julia Cole said: “Age gap relationships are becoming more and more common because of the greater acceptance of the diversity of couples and families.

“Couples can make loving relationships across ages and genders, but age gap relationships can bring with them issues that are not often considered when the couple first start seeing each other.

“If the age gap is fairly wide – more than ten years – and the relationship grows into a commitment, it is important to talk about attitudes to money, expectations of family life and what parents, siblings and friends will think about an older partner in their life as well as yours.” – Daily Mail

…More at What's the perfect age gap for a couple? – Independent Online

Some people do believe there is a plus side to having an age gap in a relationship, and those people should not be judged. If that is what they want to do that is their decision and where their heart takes them. No one should be giving advice on love once they start discriminating against someone's preference and choice.

Dating for Seniors Advice

Romance isn't just for teenagers...There is no limit on when someone is supposed to stop dating. You can date at any age. Senior dating may be hard because some people give up after a certain age and some seniors are married. These few little things should not stop you from finding love. Everyone should be able to be happy in love no matter the age, and that goes for seniors as well. (Image by Ed Yourdon via Flickr)

Here are three simple tips aimed at single seniors ready to return to the dating world.

Don't run before walking

Maybe your spouse died, maybe a long-term relationship has ended, or maybe it's time to re-enter the field after a hiatus. Whatever the reason for choosing to date again, it's important to know yourself, said Pepper Schwartz, AARP's sex and relationship expert. The University of Washington sociology professor said if someone has decided to become truly social again after an extended absence, maybe it's best for them to join a club, or volunteer somewhere before stressing about finding a date. Being comfortable with being more social will help them ease into the larger world again. They can ask a friend to accompany them on social outings to instill more confidence. “The best way to do it, I think, is to get what younger people would call a 'wingman' or 'wingwoman,'” Schwartz said.

Use caution cautiously

While it's OK to be on guard when getting to know someone, too much caution could actually become a roadblock to love. It's understandable to be protective of finances or privacy while dating, especially in the beginning of a relationship or on dating websites, but there should be a point where mistrust is allowed to morph into trust. Gail Haskett, Vancouver gerontologist and president of Aging Resources Inc., said some fall into the trap of consistently looking at what's wrong with a situation rather than what's right.

Know yourself

What are your goals in life? What do you want out of a lover? What makes you happy? These and similar questions should be explicitly considered when seeking companionship. As a person with many decades behind them, seniors are capable of a greater sense of self-understanding than in their early years. On dates, this can translate into confidence and honesty. “They feel more worthy in many ways,” Schwartz said. It's also important to be real: using a recent photo when dating online, being upfront about your circumstances and the reasons you are dating. “One of the things you have to project is you are a grown-up now,” Schwartz said.

…More at Off Beat: Pitfalls and potential: Dating tips for older singles – The Columbian

From these helpful tips you now know the dating scene has not changed. Just be you and take things slow, you will find someone great with time. This help with dating advice should lead you on the path to get back out there dating.

Over 40 Dating

An Eyeful Of Puddle!Some people think that dating at an older age is hard, but it is not. You have to have confidence in yourself and know what you are worth. You have been in a relationship before so you have learned lessons from that. Apply those lessons you have learned to future dating. Hopefully this information will help with dating and make things easier. (Image by tarotastic via Flickr)

Do you really know yourself? Surely, at this time in your life you must. Allow me to ask though: Is your perception based on your beliefs and measures, or on those of others?

There are many tender, smart, beautiful women – who have no idea how special they are. After years of being told by their family, the media, and their exes what a woman should look like, act like, and think like…they have come to believe it to be true, and continue to judge them based on those criteria.
 
WHO ARE YOU REALLY?
Okay, these are great accomplishments and task-oriented talents. But who ARE you, not what have you accomplished? What do you look for in friends? What do you think your friends value in you? What makes you a good mother? Is it that you're smart and organized? Doubtful.
 
Here are some examples of what comes up: I feel deep empathy. I am a friend people can trust. I have great legs. I'm learning to be a great sailor. I am resilient and handle life's ups and downs with grace. I make people laugh. I raised healthy children who are good people. Ahhhh…now that's a woman who is going to attract a good man.
 
SHARING YOURSELF WITH OTHERS
I have found that there is a simple truth to how one finds their wonderful match, especially for those of us in midlife: show him who you are and if he's right for you, he will know it…and he'll tell you. To do this, you need to:
  1. Know and love yourself. (That's covered.)
  2. Help the man you meet get to know you.
In American culture we often define ourselves by what we do and have, rather than who we really are. When we first meet someone we ask them “What do you do?” Isn't a better question “What do you care about?”

…More at Midlife Dating Tips: How to Rediscover and Feel Good About Yourself After 50 – LifeGoesStrong

Women, put yourself out there and show that dazzling personality of yours. Your age should not define the way you date. Age does not change the way dating goes; better yet the older the better and much more wise you should be at dating.

Young Dating Scene Fading Away

Urban LearningDating has changed over the years, especially for the young dating. With everyone wanting to gain their independence and be able to provide for themselves, some people forget that life is more than just having a career. The young forget that you can have that career while having someone there pushing you towards your goals while working on their own goals. (Image by margot.trudell via Flickr)

Traditional dating has been practically dissolved for the younger generations that have entered the professional scene. Most of them now focus on their careers instead of on family.

Professor Scott Hall, a family studies expert at BSU, stated that the research expressed that people are far more focused on their independence rather than settling down.

The numbers show that the average women are now getting married at 26, while the number was 20 in the 1950s. But it is not just women, as men are now putting off marriage for nearly a decade, as compared to their grandfathers.

For the young adults that have decided to focus on individual pursuits, rather than small-sphere communal, Hall questions the ability to adjust to the concept of monogamy once they are ready to settle down.

Studies have now shown that the increase in life experiences prior to settling down make a young person much pickier regarding whom they will date. The methods of dating have now changed rather staunchly as well.

Internet and for-sex dating give young persons a chance to explore their options prior to marriage, says Hall. BSU students Kristen Windstrom and Emily Carpenter both noted that they see the internet's effects on their dating experience, as well as those they know.

No guys have the courage anymore to come up to a girl and be like, 'Do you want to come out on a date with me?'” Windstrom said.

“There are people like who are online dating for years and they've never even met each other,” Carpenter said. “That's not dating. Go out one-on-one. Get to know the person in person.”

There are still some young people going against the trend and sticking to tradition.

…More at Study Finds Dating Is Archaic for Young Generations Reports On – SBWire (press release)

Some of the younger generation needs help with dating because they do not fully understand how to date and that seems to be why they interact (or even not interact at all) the way they do. We are in a society where the younger generation is more career driven and it can be questioned is that a good or bad thing.

Ways to Meet Men

Women, dating can be easy. You just have to make it easy on yourself by not getting overwhelmed and pressuring yourself. Hopefully from this video presented you have learned that there are 3 ways to meet men. Help with dating is out there, you just have to be willing to get some practice with dating out of the way first before fully diving in. With dating it is all about knowing what you want from a person so you know what to look for.

Good luck on your dating adventure, and hopefully you find Mr. Right.

How to Find True Love

 

176/365 - Always Kiss Me GoodnightTrue love is something beautiful to come by. When you are able to meet that person that helps you become a better you, and vice versa, you know that you have something good. People search for this on a daily basis and that is why we are giving you some advice on how to find true love. (Image by Www.CourtneyCarmody.com/ via Flickr)

Below are 14 ways to help make it happen. You may be surprised to learn that true love is not only attainable — it may be closer than you think.

  1. Romantic true love must be created. It does not ‘just happen.’
  2. You become capable of creating romantic true love when you commit to your own truth.
  3. You commit to your own truth by dedicating yourself to becoming aware of the complex and wide range of your thoughts, feelings, and experiences as they continually shift and change.
  4. You become aware as you move beyond whatever blocks you from being open to the truth of your experiences.
  5. You move beyond your blocks to truth by learning to observe your thoughts and feelings in a compassionate way, even if those thoughts or feelings are scary or inconvenient.
  6. Once you are committed to your own truth, you can work to create a romantic true love relationship.
  7. Working to create a romantic true love relationship means seeking a partner who is also committed to awareness of his or her own truth, or encouraging an existing partner to commit to awareness of his or her own truth.
  8. Once you and your partner are both individually committed to truth, you can work to build a relationship that supports truth.
  9. In a relationship that supports truth, there is space and respect for both people to have whatever thoughts and feelings they may have, even if those thoughts and feelings are scary or inconvenient.
  10. Truth in a relationship does not mean communicating every thought or feeling with your partner and causing unnecessary pain; truth in a relationship means that both partners feel safe to be open and honest about anything that seems important to share.
  11. When there is respect and space for each person’s truth, you do not have to hide from the truth in fear of your partner turning mean, denying or invalidating your thoughts or feelings, or intentionally saying or doing things to hurt or abuse you.
  12. A relationship where it is safe for truth to emerge will challenge and support both partners toward increasing awareness and connection to the spectrum of their own truth.
  13. Once you and your romantic partner are both committed to being true unto yourselves, and you are building a relationship that supports truth, only time will tell if it is romantic true love.
  14. If it is romantic true love, it will endure, growing and evolving to continue to support truth, integrating whatever arises into its fabric.

…More at 14 Truths about Romantic True Love – PsychCentral.com (blog)

From these tips that have been presented they should help with dating and assist you to find your true love. The man or woman of your dreams is out there, and you will find them.

Poem About Love

 

Happy Valentine's Day!

Image by Peggy2012CREATIVELENZ via Flickr

You’ll love me yet
You’ll love me yet!—and I can tarry
Your love’s protracted growing:
June reared that bunch of flowers you carry,
From seeds of April’s sowing.

I plant a heartful now: some seed
At least is sure to strike,
And yield—what you’ll not pluck indeed,
Not love, but, may be, like.

You’ll look at least on love’s remains,
A grave’s one violet:
Your look?—that pays a thousand pains.
What’s death? You’ll love me yet!
— Robert Browning (1812-1889)

…More at The Antidote: A Reading of 'You'll Love Me Yet' by Robert Browning – The Epoch Times

The Language of Love Through Romantic Love Letters

All We Need Is...Romantic love letters to some may be a thing of the past, but surprisingly they are not. Love letters could actually save a once successful relationship. You may think that it is crazy but maybe learning how to write a love letter and expressing your feelings to your partner is not a bad idea at all. If you don't believe it take the opinion of others on love letters and what they could do for your relationship. (Image by karlocamero via Flickr)

Handwritten expressions of true romance are rare in today's world of Twitter pronouncements and Facebook status updates. People now tailor their written declarations of love, once considered paramount to any great love affair, to recipients' short attention spans.

Yet, some argue that the love letter, among all mailings, could manage to fend off extinction.

“Love letters are still being written and, in fact, are considered even more precious nowadays, as they are not as commonly written as before,” said Liz Williams, author of “Kind Regards: The Lost Art of Letter-Writing.”

“I have not come across one person who said they would not love to receive one. And who can blame them? Who wouldn't love a real letter, rather than a hurried email or text?” Williams said.

A good love letter can help a heart on the verge of romantic flat lining to flutter back to life, said Lauren Frances, a Los Angeles author and relationship coach who bills herself as “the discreet ‘go-to' love expert for Hollywood's A-list celebrities.”

“The experience of being profoundly loved melts any kind of cynicism,” Frances said. “When people get encouraged to be their best selves, and when you get seen as your best self, it's a miracle.”

Photo5_red_ribbonImage by Julie Edgley via Flickr

Williams questions whether electronic exchanges count as the “real” thing when professing love.

“People still write very beautiful emails — although I am not quite so convinced about the efficacy of text or Twitter when it comes to affairs of the heart,” Williams said. “The problem with an email is that it's not tangible. You can't pick it up and feel the weight of the paper, or smell it, or trace the curve of the handwriting. You can tell so much about a person from their handwriting. An electronic font will never replicate that.”

Even contemporary men acknowledge that handwritten expressions pack a bigger punch than those transcribed through a keyboard.

…More at The lost art of the love letter – Tribune-Review

Break out the pen and paper and begin writing to your loved one. Writing a love letter may just spark some much needed romance you've both been wanting.

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Trust in Relationships is Key

Trust, The Foundation to a Successful Relationship

Trust is essential to having a strong relationship with your partner or future partner. Knowing how to overcome insecurity and jealousy are key to having a long lasting positive relationship, so take notes and use what you've just acquired to have a healthy, better relationship.

Tips on Relationships

To hold on to a successful relationship there are a few things that you have to keep in mind. It is not just you in the relationship and that is one thing you always have to remember if you want your relationship to continue to flourish and grow. Being able to recognize your partner and let them know they are appreciated and wanted is a good start, but below are some more helpful tips on relationships.

A gift of scanned postcard and e.e.cummings for you on Valentine's Day

Image by aliceinthepoetsheartland via Flickr

According to those at RelationshipRx, there are some easy steps people can take to build more intimacy and strengthen their relationships on a daily basis:

1. Take a Trip Down Memory Lane: Reminisce on how you first got together.

“With all the different stressors and issues couples face, it is easy to forget what brought you together in the first place,” said Gordon. 

Gordon says remembering these times can easily rekindle those initial loving feelings.

2. Learn to Listen: According Gordon, it is important to listen to your partner completely and non-judgmentally.

“Couples who are skilled at providing each other with social support have been shown to be healthier and happier than less skilled couples.”

3. Draw Love Maps: Couples research shows partners can feel closer and more intimate by taking as little as five extra minutes a day to create something called “love maps,” said Gordon.

“At the beginning of the day, share what your day will be like,” said Gordon. “This way, during the day, you can think about your partner and appreciate what his or her day must be like.”

At the end of the day, partners should share and listen closely to how each other’s day went.

4. Show Support: Identify two small things that each of you can do to provide support when the other is having a difficult day, such as doing the dishes or allowing your partner to vent.

“Research has shown that partners who can support each other around shared challenges can actually experience increased intimacy in their relationship,” said Audrey Kasting, Relationship Rx facilitator and counseling graduate student.

5. Play to Your Strengths. The experts say every couple is good at something.

Common strengths include:

  • Friendships: Couples research has found that the quality of a couple’s friendship is one of the strongest predictors of relationship well-being.
  • Acceptance: The healthiest couples have found ways to cope well with each other’s quirks and to accept each other for the “natural flaws in the fabric.”
  • Commitment: Couples research has consistently found a strong association between shared commitment and relationship health and stability.

…More at UT Psychologists Offer Five Tips for Healthy Relationships – Tennessee Today

You love your partner so keep the love alive by keeping the communication flowing, supporting your partner, reminiscing on what made you two an item and you'll never have to question whether or not your relationship is a healthy one. This is how to keep a relationship healthy.

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How to Fix a Relationship

With having your own life it is easy to forget about your significant other and their life. This can deteriate a relationship over time if you keep forgetting about your partner and their self-worth and the reason you fell for them in the first place. To have a successful relationship there are certain steps to take to keep it.

Love Love Love

Image by Gregory Jordan via Flickr

Here's a list of 8 things couples need to do every single day!

Compliment each other - Take a moment to praise your significant other for something they've done.

Laugh - Nobody should ever go a complete day without laughing. It truly is the best medicine all around. Share a laugh with your partner at least once a day, even on the worst, most depressing days.

Say those three words - “I love you.” Go on — say it to your partner every single day. It's a must.

Notice the little things - Noticing and remembering the little details in life show your spouse that you really do pay attention to them. More than they think.

Put things in perspective - Whatever you may be upset about or just feeling lukewarm about in terms of your relationship, take a step back. In the end, no matter what troubles you're dealing with, just remember you're not in it alone.

Dream big - The most powerful emotion in the entire universe is hope. Nothing is impossible. So dream big and share those dreams with your spouse. Even if they never come true, it's still something worth hoping for.

Share something new - Remember when you first started dating and EVERYTHING was fresh and new — from details of family history right down to favorite pizza toppings? But after being in a relationship for a while you may feel there's nothing left to uncover. There's always something new you can share with your spouse. Could be a movie you just watched, a fantastic article you just read, or some favorite childhood memories. Share and share alike.

Lock lips - It goes without saying but you should start and end each day exactly the same way; with a gentle kiss on the lips.

…More at 8 Things Couples Should Do Every Single Day to Keep the Spark Alive – The Stir (blog)

Once you begin doing these steps on a daily basis your relationship will have no choice but to get better if the two of you really care about each other.

Advance Relationships Chemistry for Love

You've just entered into a relationship with someone and want what you guys have to last without being overwhelming. To keep things nice and simple and to be able to acquire a serious relationship that last because you took the correct first steps, here is what you need to do to do that:

Many thanks for your prayers my friends, I love you very muchImage by Jose Luis Mieza Photography via Flickr

Restrain PDA
You can’t keep your hands off each other right now, but how much PDA (public display of affection) is too much? If your beau is comfortable with it, hand-holding and looking into each other’s eyes are generally accepted in most public places. French kissing, groping and fondling are best attempted briefly, and when no one in the vicinity is staring.

Limit the texting
No matter how urgent you think it is, don’t convey emotional messages over SMS. Use texting for short, factual communication like informing your date that you are stuck in traffic. Don’t share every detail of your day done by calling or texting; you’ll be considered a bore by even the most polite listener. You don’t really need to know every little piece of information about each other. And drunk dialing is a strict no-no… always!

Don’t meet too often
We understand how you want to spend every second of every day with your new love. It may feel great for the first week or so, but eventually your other commitments may pile up and one of you may end up getting annoyed with the other for taking too much time.

Don’t be clingy
In the modern dating world, giving each other space is an essential requirement to a healthy relationship. Right now, you’re only a small part of each other’s lives. So don’t give yourself more importance than you deserve.

Converse!
The passion of a new romance leaves the lovers with little time for deep, intimate conversation. So, try to sneak in a long conversation whenever you’re not busy feeling each other up. Find out each other’s likes, dislikes, interests in music, movies and books, for instance. Such conversations are spot-on predictors for chemistry for love.

Keep friends at bay
It’s understandable to want to show off your sweetheart to your closest friends. But in the initial phase, refrain from inviting friends when your new beau is with you. It will overwhelm the person who might be scared that things are moving too fast.

Adjust to habits
Accept each other’s habits. Instead of trying to change the person to fit your standards of what a potential mate should be like, learn to adjust to their (sometimes annoying) habits. You risk losing him forever if you put restrictions on the way he lives his life at the very beginning.

Gifts can wait
If you want to express your love, keep the gifts small. Despite the fact that your sweetheart is always on your mind these days, don’t go overboard with gifts. Save the spending sprees for later when the relationship has matured.

…More at Relationship Advice for a Perfect Start – iDiva.com

Take things nice and slow in this new relationship you are entering. Don't overwhelm each other by moving too fast and seeing each other too often. All that will do is make you both grow tired of each other and the relationship will either not last or get boring. You want the relationship to always be fresh and fun so take things slow and as they come.

Deal Breaker Questions About Relationships

sensitive noise / obvious 2Rather it be a fresh brand new relationship, or you've been with your partner for quite some time now and are questioning if this is the right person for you. You are seeking that long-term serious relationship and want to make sure you are not wasting your time because no one wants to really be with someone if the relationship is not going to go anywhere. (Image by milos milosevic via Flickr)

The following are 30 questions about relationships that can help you achieve more clarity about your relationship—what’s working, what’s not, and why. Please keep in mind there are no wrong or right answers, just insightful ones:

1. Do you completely trust each other?

2. Do you believe in soul mates, and if so, do you believe you are each other’s?

3. When was the last time you said, “I love you?” If it’s been a while, why?

4. Are you satisfied with the intimacy you share?

5. How often do you laugh together?

6. Do you feel you have made personal sacrifices for your relationship, and have they been reciprocated?

7. When you think of your partner, do you smile?

8. Do you feel threatened when others find your partner attractive, and why?

9. Do you believe your partner is your biggest advocate?

10. How do you feel about your partner’s views on finances?

11. Do you enjoy spending time with your partner’s relatives? Friends?

12. Do either of you dredge up resentments in arguments, and why have you struggled to let them go?

13. How do you feel when your partner arrives home after being away?

14. Is your partner your best friend?

15. Is there a secret you are keeping that if your partner knew, you feel you would lose them?

16. Do you feel that your partner accepts you?

17. When did you realize you had fallen in love, and how do you feel when you think about it?

18. Have you seen each other at your best and worst?

19. Would you ever consider having an affair? Why? Why not?

20. Are you excited about your future together?

21. Do you feel your relationship is a true partnership?

22. When was your last romantic outing?

23. Does it bother you if your partner has friends of the opposite sex, and why?

24. Do you accept each other’s belief systems?

25. When was the last time you talked about your future together, and were you on the same page?

26. Do you feel as if you can communicate without saying a word?

27. What is your happiest memory of your time together? Your worst? Are there more happy memories than unhappy ones?

28. What is a relationship deal breaker for you, and have you overlooked one in this relationship?

29. How do you feel about the last, in-depth conversation you and your partner had?

30. Do you show your love for each other often, and if not, why?

…More at 30 Questions to Help If You Have Doubts About Your Relationship …

Once you've answered all the questions and the good outweighs the bad, or the bad outweighs the good, then you've found your answer and know what to do next to make the move(s) towards a better relationship.

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Advice About Relationships and Dating

You've gotten a good dose of advice on dating so you know what you want and expect out of someone you are dating or in a relationship with. You also have to know how to maintain a serious relationship, so here are some tips on making your relationship last.

Scientists at the University of Illinois recently analyzed 45 studies and 12,273 reports on relationships and narrowed down their findings into five strategies for keeping the bond strong with your significant other. According to the pros, here are the best strategies to include in your relationship game plan:

1. Clear the air. Talk about whatever's on your mind, even if it’s just that you’re annoyed. Putting it off will only force you to bottle up emotions and that could lead to passive aggressive actions later on.

Another traditional picture.Image by tonyboytran via Flickr

2. Get happy. If you’re pissed off, chances are your crappy mood will rub off on everyone around you, including your significant other. Sure, sometimes a bad mood is unavoidable, but do your best to stay positive … especially on date night.

3. Divide and conquer. Taking part in shared responsibilities reminds each other that you’re both committed.

4. Mix it up. Of course you love your one-on-one time with one another, but including friends and family in your activities can actually help you out as a couple in a very serious relationship. It shows you're  interested in the people your partner cares about and gives them the opportunity to get to know your crew as well.

5. Leave no doubts. Simply put, make sure your spouse knows that you are 100% into them—and not just for their looks. Encourage your spouse to achieve their own goals and lend support whenever they need it most. You don’t have to make an elaborate production out of building your partner up; a sum of small daily gestures should do the trick.

…More at 5 Ways to Keep Your Relationship Alive – Men's Fitness

Be the happy person you were when your partner met you, be spontaneous and keep things fresh. Yes you may have some days where you just don't feel up to it because something has you down, but discuss that with your partner. You are with this person for a reason and that is because they understand you. Communication is necessary for a successful relationship.

Relationship Stages and What They Entail

Steps Towards Commitment

Chris & Jessica Engagement - Falling

You've been getting to know someone for some time now and want to know where you stand with this special person. Relationship stages are very important because no one wants to be on a different page from what their prospective partner is. Below is some advice on relationships and the different stages.

Image by Auzigog via Flickr

It can be helpful to keep yourself on track with an awareness of the important steps in going from me to we:

Attraction: This often happens upon first meeting each other. Potentially future partners associate, flirt, and sometimes have uncommitted sex.

Developing Interest: If there is an initial attraction, two people might agree to pursue their curiosity and interest in each other. So, they date.

Engagement: As their dating gets more serious, they might decide to only see each other. They put more energy and hope into the relationship; and seriously consider a future together.

love is in the air, love is everywereImage by Luz Adriana Villa A. via Flickr

Commitment: They find safety and comfort in each other’s arms. Ideally, they enjoy time together and physical intimacy, support each other’s personal interests, and develop mutual goals. They also commit to a life together; which often, but not always, means marriage.

A common struggle in developing serious relationships occurs when the two people are in different stages of relationship development. Often, the partners are not so far apart; so they can give each other the time or personal space they need to work through differences. However, it can be a breaking point in your relationship when your level of interest in each other is too far apart.

…More at From Me to We – WebMD (blog)

Knowing these different stages is helpful because you don't want to scare the person you are dating off by moving too fast or doing things that should be held off later when the relationship gets much more serious. Take things slow and just let things happen naturally and for all you know you'll end up in a committed relationship.

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Advice for Guys on Dating

Need help at getting the woman of your dreams or have you not been able to get a date lately and have been questioning why? When it comes to dating some guys know how to charm, some are shy, and some think that they know what they are doing; either way here is some good date advice to better your shot at becoming a professional at dating while boosting your confidence in other aspects of your life. 

The best and most effective dating advice for guys that exists incorporates guidelines for adopting alpha male behavior, as emphasized by Dating Expert Carlos Xuma in his new report.

“This is pretty much the key to any and all types of success in the dating world,” Xuma says. “Any guy who can adopt alpha male traits and make them a natural part of his personality is bound to find success with women.”

In fact, Xuma says, a guy who successfully emulates the right alpha male behavior will see a surge of success in every area of his life: dating, work, and other personal relationships.

“Alpha male traits have been misunderstood and underestimated for a long time in this society,” Xuma says. “When a guy gets them right, he can’t lose.”

The problem, Xuma explains in the report on men's dating advice, is that too many men confuse jerk qualities with alpha male traits.

“Being selfish, arrogant, and a bully are not alpha male characteristics,” Xuma explains. “Being a leader, confident, and nurturing, however, are typical traits of the alpha male. Unfortunately there aren’t a lot of men who get this difference. That makes the men who do correctly exhibit alpha male behavior seem even more rare and desirable.”

Read more … http://www.digitaljournal.com/pr/1019688#ixzz2KoMJQj00

Women want a guy that has charisma, charm and confidence but is not cocky. Men, those three things speak volume and is what will essentially woo a lady. So if you want that date with that special girl you've been too scared to muster up the courage for, do it now with confidence and you never know she just may say yes.

Advice For Women – The Top Ten Dating Tips you Should Remember

A World In Motion is a World Upside-DownDating someone for a while is the foundation to starting a committed relationship and if you want to have a successful relationship, then you should know what to do and what not to do when it comes to dating. You don't want to automatically ruin what your trying to build with this person my insulting them or mentioning how your ex does something you'd like them to do, AWKWARD!!. Dating can be pretty tricky so here is some helpful date advice. (Image by Brandon Christopher Warren via Flickr)

The top 10 dating dos and don’ts:

Be positive and warm. Always smile, and don’t be a Debbie Downer. Check out when you’re not feeling chemistry, as it can come back and haunt you later – remember that it’s a small world, and everybody knows everybody. Be your own PR person; you never know if he will introduce you to his brother, cousin or friend. You always want to leave a good taste in someone’s mouth about you.

Be present and discuss. Ask about his hobbies and interests, but don’t interrogate a guy and act like a private investigator (where are you from, what do you do for a living, etc.). Never talk about the future because it will guarantee no future. 

When you are having a great time, don’t stay too long. An hour and a half should suffice because too long will turn into too much information and too much alcohol. Leave him desiring more and wanting to see you again. Always leave on a high note. When things are going good just exit on that note. If there is a connection, he will pursue you.

Be thoughtful and initiate a plan. It’s okay for a woman to plan a date, just not the first date. Don’t always expect a man to do everything. He isn’t your father; he’s the man you are dating. Men want love and attention just like women.

Compliment him. If he looks good and smells good, tell him! Everyone wants to feel good about him or herself.

Guys cannot stand a girl that is too chatty and catty. It is an automatic turn-off. Another turn-off is a girl who nags. Remember that guys like a girl who can make meaningful contributions to the conversation and not just talk about other people.

Dress sexy but not provocative. Men are visual creatures. A little leg and a little arm never hurt, but do not go overboard and send the wrong message. Be sure to leave something to the imagination.

Don’t drink too much. Two drink maximum, ladies! Anymore, and you may become sloppy. A turn-on is someone who can hold her own and still carry on a conversation without relying on liquid courage.

After a great date, you can send a thank you text, but that’s it! Don’t smother a guy and over-pursue him. No one likes desperation in a woman.

Guys don’t like when you compare your relationship to another one. They don’t want to hear about your friends and their relationships. Just remember, the male ego is fragile and needs to be handled with care.

…More at Top 10 Dating Dos and Don'ts – DivineCaroline

These tips should help you snag the guy you like and get into something serious or if you don't like a guy you can do exactly what these tips are telling you not to do to scare them away. Just kidding, in that case you should let them know as soon as possible you're not into them.

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The College Dating Scene

Dating in college can be a tricky situation because it is usually where your understanding of how to date starts to build. Here are a few things that you should keep in mind so that one day down the line when you begin a fresh new relationship you have this date advice to look back on and thank for guiding you correctly on how to successfully date without the added drama.

Consider ThisImage by dirac3000 via Flickr

A very important piece of advice for college students is to remember that the campus is relatively small. For example if you do something mean or unethical to one girl, it can be literally only a matter of minutes before word spreads through her entire dorm that you can’t be trusted.

Cheating is very difficult to hide in a college situation. With so many opportunities for students to interact on a social level it is very unlikely that you would be able to get away with seeing more than one person at a time.

Don’t date people in your dorm– or if you do, proceed with caution. If you break up, you’re going to be stuck with each other for the rest of the year.

Don't be aggressive too quick. Do not commit too fast since you should keep your options open. Also, try not to have a serious girl when the new semester or year begins, the crop is too fresh and the harvest season is too good to pass up.

Keeping a fresh look – Some girls prefer the shaggy look, but if you are thinking about “shagging”, then shave, shower and be presentable. No one expects you to wear suits or Polo shirts, but you should consider things such as grooming and overall presentation.

Dating your best friend's girl – Obvi right? Well believe it or not it happens. I knew one of my friends who did it, not only did he get a slap or two. But he lost both his friend and the girl left him after it.  It sucks so I don’t recommend it, but if you decide to proceed with caution! On that note ask your friend before you do it!

Not taking the risk -  We all are nervous at first to confront the one we like. But if you don’t take the initiative who’s to say they would? The one thing that will surely haunt you is not taking the chance to talk to that girl you’ve been eyeing; she may have been shy and just waiting for you to go up to her, but you never did. Besides what’s the worst that can happen they say no? Oh well rookie mistake you get them next year.

…More at 10 Dont's of College Dating | The Red Cup Nation

The college dating scene is small so if you are going to seriously date while in college be cautious of what you do and don't ruin your reputation. You don't want to be known as the cereal dater.

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Date Etiquette

Date in the Light seaWhen going on a date you want your date to go flawless without any problems that one of you may complain about when it comes to manners and so forth. That is why date etiquette is the most important date advice to know and understand when you go out on a date whether it be your first date ever with that person or the hundredth date with them. You always want your partner to feel as if it is the first date all over again and that you are invested in your  relationship. (Image by Miroslav Petrasko (blog.hdrshooter.net) via Flickr)

Below are a few tips, a couple of insights and, hopefully, some etiquette on dating.

If this is a first date, then the special lady will have a pretty good idea in the first 15 minutes of how the rest of the night will go. Men, this is your moment to shine. Enjoy the social time, that's what you're there for. And if you play your cards right, there might be two desserts.

Cell phones. Unless you're expecting an emergency, keep it in your pants at all times. Show that special someone they are the most important person in the world by keeping the cell phone off the table. No texting. No talking. However, it's okay to use a smart phone to find details about the next event on your date such as show times and location.

Table manners? Please! Simple etiquette is required at all times. And it's simple. Keep all types of hot air in. No one wants to hear, or smell how awesome you are. Elbows off the table, handle that fork and knife with some finesse, and take small bites.

[Men only] So you made it all the way through dinner without incident. You were clever, charming and she still approves. Now it's time to pay the bill. Although chivalry is a dying art, the man should pay because it keeps you out of the friendship factor if it's a first date.

…More at It's time to get all romantic up in here – Regina Leader-Post

Be yourself on any date that you go on, just don't be a rude version of yourself. As everyone's parents have taught them, treat those as you would want to be treated. So while out on a date treat that person how you would want to be treated and everything should go smoothly.

Tips for a First Date – Being Nervous is OK

No matter it is Valentine or not !Date Advice and First Date Jitters

The first date is always the most important one because it is where you get to know one another and if you want to continue going on dates with each other and begin something more with that person. That alone makes you nervous, but don’t worry your date probably is too.  Image by HAMED MASOUMI via Flickr

Here are eight tips for a first date and reasons not to stress about the first date:

1. You get to judge, too. It’s very easy to waste a whole lot of time worrying about whether the person you’re going on a date with will like you. But your precious hours are probably better spent thinking about whether you like your date. As Tom Hanks’ character tells his fictional son in “Sleepless In Seattle,” “This is what single people do. They try other people on and see how they fit.” Spend your first date evaluating whether the person sitting across from you seems like a well-tailored suit or more like an ill-fitting item that’s better left on the rack.

2. There’s no need to be elaborate. The focus of your first meet-up is getting a feel for the other person. That means that lighthearted conversation is paramount — not a super creative plan that involves multiple stops, top-tier restaurants and hipster underground bars. Just pick a coffee shop/bar/restaurant where you feel comfortable … or make it really easy on yourself and make your date choose.

3. People are open to a lot of different date venues. Judging from a new info graphic from dating site HowAboutWe.com, Americans are open to a wide variety of dating activities. If you feel like eating frozen yogurt, seeing an art exhibit, going bowling or drinking a glass of wine, chances are that your date will be into it too.

4. You don’t have much to lose. You don’t know the person well yet, so you probably aren’t all that invested in them romantically. No matter how badly it goes, you’ll get over it fairly quickly. That’s the true beauty of a first date.

5. You can keep it short. If you plan something casual, it’ll be over in approximately the same amount of time it takes you to watch two episodes of “Girls.”

6. If it goes really badly, it’ll be a good story. Some of the most entertaining conversations you can have with friends revolve around dating horror stories. Whether you’re recounting the story of the dude who casually mentioned that there was a rapist who hadn’t been caught in his neighborhood, or the tale of the girl who wouldn’t stop talking about her 10 cats, those hours of awkwardness are sure to elicit laughs for years to come. If your first date goes completely awry, at least you have fresh material for your next friend dinner.

7. It’s nearly impossible to run out of things to talk about. The first date covers all of your basics, which means that there are a lot of things to discuss: jobs, families, hometowns, hobbies, living situations … the list goes on.

…More at 8 Reasons Not To Stress Out About The First Date – Huffington Post

With the date advice you’ve just acquired and you just being yourself, your first date experience will only get better with the more first dates you go on and sooner or later you will find yourself in a relationship.

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Meeting Your Relationship Needs

How to determine your top 5 relationship needs and stop limiting your dating options

Crossed fingers I

Are you that person that your friends or family always try to set up but you always refuse because you think they don't know you or your just too picky? With the information that you are about to acquire you may just change your mind from now on and go on dates with these people that your friends and family are trying to set you up with because they just may be the match for you. The date advice you are about to be given will surely make you be a little more open minded and narrow down exactly what is important to you when it comes to dating someone. (Image by Katie Tegtmeyer via Flickr)

  1. Begin by listing all the desires you could ever dream to have met by a partner. They can be feelings, specific criteria, and physical attributes, whatever. Jot down as many as you want. Knock yourself out. I’ll wait…
  2. Have you exhausted your list? Congrats. Now narrow it down to five. Yup, that’s right, FIVE. Get to trimming. You’ll be surprised what falls away when you can only choose five. But the important ones will pop out at you, promise. They’ll make themselves clear. 
  3. Let your intuition guide you when it seems like you’re caught between two needs. 
  4. If you get super stuck, hit the Webster Dictionary. No joke, this really works. You’ll hone in on what exactly a word means. You might be surprised, at the very least, and at best, you’ll get the clarification you need on which to choose. 

 …More at How to determine your top 5 relationship needs (and stop limiting ...

Once you begin to be more open minded and see that you're either being too picky or not picky enough you'll certainly meet your relationship needs and know exactly what it is you are generally looking for rather than counting someone out; for example, because they don't have blonde hair or drive a BMW. If you want your needs met and finally get in a good relationship you must be realistic, and here is your chance to begin doing so.